Saints Row – The Third Review

Saints Row – The Third brings you from Stilwater to Steelport. Three local gangs have already dominated this new fictional city but the Third Street Saints are only keen for being the most feared and the best gang around. As you make your plans for crushing all the rivals, you will have fun in being violent, being indiscreet, and being crazy in this game.

The Good News About Saints Row – The Third

After determining your mission to invade Steelport, you have all the customization freedom that you want for your character and your vehicles. Of course, you have more vehicles to choose from as well as exciting weapons (shotguns, pistols, submachine guns) and other stuff you need for wreaking havoc to the city. You can go to a Rim Jobs mechanic shop and indulge in all the ways you can customize your car and improve its performance. The tone of The Third is like a perfect harmony of Hollywood action thrillers, Old World essence, and adult humor.

Time flies by so quickly because of the plethora of activities you will get involved with. In Mayhem, you must produce a specific level of destruction while under time pressure. The presence of big tank helps in achieving your goal here. Then there is the Guardian Angel where you have to defend the Saints gang while operating a sniper rifle or a rocket launcher from a helicopter. Of course, you can have fun with Professor Genki’s Super Ethical Reality Climax by traversing through dangerous obstacles and hurdling enemies.

Even if there is a sense of predictability with all the missions, you are in for a few surprises every now and then, which make The Third quite outrageous and entertaining. Since you play this in co-op mode, having your gaming buddies around proves to be more chaotic and hilarious.

Screenshot from Cherished Memories #7 from Saints Row - The Third (Credit: THQ)

The Bad News About Saints Row – The Third

Some cringe-worthy aspects of The Third are its stupid characters and dialogues that just do not care about having sex and violence with its every scene (although this combination is a winner among many gamers).

But aside from the custom-designed vehicles and glammed-up characters, the locations around Steelport are lost in a state of blur and haze. It should have been a dynamic city instead of looking like a childlike playset. Aside from the glittering skyscrapers, the districts are flat and lifeless. Landscape features seem disconnected with the environment.

Furthermore, it is just easy to take down the members of the rival gangs and even the cops because they are just leaving themselves defenseless in the open, proving their lack of intelligence.

And then there are two alternate endings, both of which are quite frustrating and senseless.

The Bottom Line

Saints Row: The Third is an appealing choice for those who love absurdity, mayhem, and raunchy pleasure. The open-world insanity and chaos, with its perverted acts and mindless bloodshed, thrills diehard fans. But if you just want to throw up with the abuse of the sex and violence tandem, this might be a turnoff.